I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
it was like eating out sand paper
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Found your dick twin last night
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
