dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
My vagina just recognized that song.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
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