You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
