yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
