Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
