i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
