Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
