My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
