is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
