ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize