I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
