I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
is wine microwaveable?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize