the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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