Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
