weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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