hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
