I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize