I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
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