plz talk dirty to me
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
