sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize
