Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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