If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
now i know why i became what i already was.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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