I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
