i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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