he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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