some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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