No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
