The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize