umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
