just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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