would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
