I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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