I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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