I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
