Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
