a queef is a wish your heart makes.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
