did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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