yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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