just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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