There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
