Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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