They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
