It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Randomize
