If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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