I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize