I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize