I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
