I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
