why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
