Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Randomize
