youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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